4 Day Countdown

Well, I made it through another day of work this morning and it wasn't nearly as exhausting as I thought it was going to be. I had more energy than I expected. I just have one more day of work to get through now and I will be good to go. I think I can make it to the 12th. I haven't had much cramping lately and no regular contractions, so I should be good. I am trying really hard to stay off my feet and rest, so I don't trigger anything, but the nesting thing keeps getting the better of me. Earlier this evening I couldn't take it anymore and I had to clean out and organize all my kitchen cabinets. I have to say I do feel better now after getting that done. I did finish the October part in my Fall 2010 photo book this afternoon. Now I just need to get through November and do my Holiday one. I am not motivated in the least bit to do any of it. Maybe tomorrow I will get some motivation to finish at least the Fall one. I am hoping to burn Fall 2010 videos and our Holiday Videos to DVDs maybe tonight or tomorrow. I also need to finalize some of my mini DVDs and label them. Everyday I get more and more excited for Jason to get here. I am also super excited that Jason will be home tonight. He was supposed to be gone until tomorrow, but since I am due anytime his boss told him to come back tonight with them and I am so glad! I feel like I will be able to breathe easier with Jason at home. It was a little stressful trying to keep a back up plan for if I went into labor while he was gone. It will be so much easier with him here. Jason is going to be in total baby mode when he gets home. He has been working/preparing for this ATA show forever and it has been a bit of a stressor for him since this is his first year as the Marketing Manager. He was in charge and had to run everything for it. He said once he got through this he was going to be excited and anxious for Jax to get here. Not that he hasn't been this whole time,he has just been preoccupied and now all he has to think about is the baby coming! I will be in the same boat after Monday night. I don't know how we are going to make it through Tuesday with all this excitement. I know I will not be able to sleep at all Tuesday night, not that I get much sleep anyways right now. I am really hoping to have all day Tuesday with Christian to just be with him and have fun and then Tuesday evening I want the three of us to have a great evening together, since it will be the last time we will be a family of three. I do feel like Christian and I have spent a lot of good quality time together this week which was really nice. He has just been the sweetest little thing ever. He tells me all the time how much he loves me and Jaxson and gives me so many hugs and kisses all the time. I will miss him so much when I am in the hospital. I have it planned out for him to hopefully come visit a lot with my mom, since she will be the one watching him while I am in there. I talked to one of my clients that is a nurse at the hospital that I am delivering in and I asked her about having 6 people in the room when I deliver and she said that she thought it would be okay and just to let my nurse know ahead of time. I was relieved to hear this, because I really want Jason, Alisann, Mom, Grandma, Jamie, and Becky in there with us if they are able to make it there. One thing I do still need to get ready is have Christian's clothes out for when he meets Jaxson for the first time and what he will wear when we bring Jax home from the hospital. I would trust my Dad to pick out a cute outfit for Christian, but not my Mom. My dad has always been the fashion expert in our family and mom could care less about it. I got a Victoria's Secret Magazine in the mail today and of course it had their swimsuits in it. I should have saved it as motivation for me to loose this baby weight before summer. I have never had much of a problem loosing weight, but I also can not diet and I am not to thrilled about exercising, so it may not be easy for me. I would love to be down to 140 or 135 by the time I go back for my 6 week check up at the end of February. I think that may be wishful thinking though especially since I am not breast feeding. I have also been thinking about how I am going to get myself into a new routine. I think that is going to be the key to keeping my sanity with work and a newborn and a three year old! I need to remember to take things one day at a time and try to relax and enjoy this as much as possible. I regret being so stressed in the beginning with Christian and not enjoying it more. I just had such a hard time adjusting to everything with him. I do think not breast feeding will help things. that alone was a big stress for us and was so not worth worrying about. Even though I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore, I can't help but be a little sad about it also. I wish the last month wasn't so uncomfortable and miserable, so you could enjoy it more. I know I will miss getting to feel Jax move around. I will miss getting to have him all to myself. Once he comes out i have to share him with everyone which is wonderful and great, but is nice to be able to have him all to myself now too. I also never know if this could be the last time to be pregnant and even though my pregnancies are not enjoyable I am not ready to not ever be pregnant again. Our plan is to start trying again anywhere from a year to two years from now, but you never know what complications could arise in the meantime or what could happen once we start trying again. I really hope the we are able to have a third and maybe even a fourth, but you never know what the future holds. I know regardless everything will work out just the way it should. I am trying to make the most of these last few days, just in case it is the last time I will have this experience. Everything will work just the way it should. I do have faith in that! Only 4 more days until I hold my baby Jax!