34 Weeks

I am 34 weeks pregnant today! Only 6 more weeks until my due date and only 5 more weeks until I deliver if I get induced. I will be considered full term in 3 more weeks. That in it's self will be a relief! I weighed in this morning at 157. I go back to the doctor tomorrow so we will see what their scale says. My swelling is still doing good. I think the cold weather is really helping with that! I am still able to wear all my rings. I hated having to take these off when I was pregnant with Christian. I feel naked without them. My back had been hurting a lot lately and my heartburn is about unbearable. I am definitely having a hard time getting around these days with my big belly in the way. I am sleeping horribly at night also. If I am not getting up to pee then I am waking up because of puking in my mouth from the heart burn. Then once I am awake I can't get back to sleep because I start freaking out about everything and I can't get comfortable. If I lay on my back I have trouble breathing and I get tired of laying on my side. I am still super excited for Jaxson to get here, but I can't help but freak out and feel totally overwhelmed with the thought of how hard things will be. I am remembering now how hard it is to function on no sleep. The days are so hard to get through when you are exhausted and taking care of a three year old. I feel like I expect so much out of Christian and it;s because I am so tired from not sleeping that I have no patience for normal three year old behavior. Then I keep thinking that it is only going to be ten times worse when Jax gets here because then I will have two to take care of. I sometimes wonder what was I thinking, but then I feel bad for thinking that. One thing I am grateful for is that Jason is so good about getting up at night and doing feedings. He ended up getting up more than I did with Christian. Anytime I talk to him about my fears he gets a little irritated with me because he is so excited and he thinks we will be just fine! I'm sure we will survive, I just hope I don't lose my mind and sanity in the process. The crazy thing is I still want to have three or four kids. I don't know what is wrong with me! Part of me is ready right now to get this pregnancy over with and then part of me is still needing and wanting to get things finished around here. I am about half way through getting everything washed and put away for Jaxson. I am glad I decided to do that this week instead of waiting until after Christmas. We are going to have enough stuff to do around the house after Christmas and I can't believe how long it has taken for me to wash, dry, fold, and organize everything! I think Jason and I are going to try and finish our Christmas shopping tonight and then next week I think I am going to get the rest of everything that I need for the hospital and maybe even the last few things that we will need for Jaxson. I need to get all my diaper bags organized and put together. As soon as Christmas is over we are putting the Christmas decorations away and setting up everything for Jaxson. The week before I deliver I am planning on deep cleaning my house and finishing up as many Photobooks as I can. I still need to get Christian's thank you cards out from his birthday party. I wrote them all out right after his party and for some reason I keep forgetting to sit down and address them and get them in the mail! Hopefully I can get that done today also. I have a lot of blogging to catch up on from last weekend. Hopefully I can get that caught up in the next few days also. I'm telling you I feel like there is so much to do in so little time. I have about a week to a week and a half until I get checked and have another ultrasound. I am really looking forward to this appointment. I feel like then things will be set for sure then. I am a little worried that I might not be dilated yet and then I won't know what to do with work. I love my job, but this part of it really sucks. It is hard when other people depend directly on you and only you to do a certain job. I love my client to death and I like to try and be as accommodating as I can to all of them. I hate to cancel or reschedule any of them. In the 10 years that I have been a Hairstylist I have never called in sick (knock on wood). I would hate it if I had to reschedule so many people now. Well, ready or not Jaxson will come when he is ready, so I need to just relax and let it all go the way it is meant to. I am trying to take things one day at a time and get everything done in the process.